ADVENTURES OF A RETAIL WARRIOR

fuckno-retail:

I hate when people tell me what the weather is outside.

I have seven 12-foot windows behind me.
SEVEN.
RIGHT BEHIND ME.

No, you’re absolutely right, I had no idea it was raining.

(Source: fiveminforfun.com)

When you go in for the interview:

First day:

Every day after:

When you quit:

Oh my fucking god.

Today was just one of those days.  You know the days, the wish-I-could-bash-my-head-through-the-wall-and get-worker’s-comp kinda days. All shift long I wanted to strangle each and every customer I waited on.  I had money tossed at me, idiotic questions asked, homeless people to deal with, and ice cream morons.

Some examples:

A lady yelled “LIGHTBULBS!” across the front of the store at me, apparently she wanted to know where we stock them.

I rang up a guy at my main register for ice cream and asked him what kind he wanted (since I was going to scoop it). He said, “I will take a look.”  I said, “Let me know when you are ready.” He said, “I’m ready,” before he even got to the counter to look.

A customer shoved her cart in front of the cashier’s area of the next register and said “I’m leaving this here, someone else can take it,” then walked out the door right next to our tiny cart corral.

A guy bought diapers and threw some candies on the register, then didn’t have enough money so I had to void the candies right back off.  Did he turn right around and put them back? No, he left them for me to put back.

A guy shoved something he didn’t want into my checkstand lane.  So I said, “You can hand that to me.” He said, “But I don’t want it.” I said, “But you need to hand it to me so that I can put it back WHERE IT GOES.”

A little girl in a cart pulled a shirt off the wall of the next checkstand and said “Oopsies,” and dropped it purposely on the floor.

A lady was going out the door to hand off an ice cream and yelled what flavor she wanted at me as she was going out.  When she came back, I had the cone all ready for her.  No thanks at all.

After the above lady, I was leaving the ice cream stand and this lady yells at me, “Don’t leave, I want ice cream!” Then proceeds to argue with me about not having enough of a certain flavor.  Listen, if I can’t tell when I don’t have enough to fill your order. Takes ten minutes to scoop her a single pint and ten more minutes to take her money from her.

**OH, BUT THE WINNER OF THE DAY**

Lady hands me $13 in cash and wants to pay the rest by card (like $3.XX), so then she asks to get a DOLLAR cash back. I end up handing her one of the singles SHE JUST GAVE ME.

First I ask the guy what he would like and he ignores me because he is texting. :/ Then I tell him, 

The guy orders a double scoop ice cream in a cup.  Scoop it and hand it to him.  He whines about how he has gotten a double before and it was bigger (Listen dude, I scoop what the scooper holds.) So I gave him a little more. I said “Is that all?” and he says, “Yes.” So I ring him up, and he says, “Wait, I need another only three scoops.” So I scoop him a triple of the same flavor.  Then he says, “I need another, two scoops of the same.” So I scoop him another double of the same.  I finally say, “You know, you would have saved a lot money just buying a half gallon of that flavor.” He says, “I know.” (WTF then?) Then he wants another TRIPLE, but this time with 2 flavors.  But he doesn’t say “triple,” he says “Like this,” and holds up one of the containers and I have to guess what it is. (It’s all the same flavor so the scoops can be hard to see.) So I am trying to ask how many scoops of each flavor he wants and he just keeps interrupting me, going “This flavor, this flavor,” and holding up the cup.  I finally say, “Look, I know you want that flavor, but you want a different flavor too and you want THREE scoops.  So I need you to tell me how many scoops you want of this flavor and how many of the other one.” Finally, that sinks in and I get the last one scooped.

Lucky for him because that scooper was starting to look like a mighty nice weapon.

And I already had the gloves on.

Yesterday I was at work; I’m a cashier in a large drug store chain. I was scheduled to work 5am-10am for freight. The opening cashier called in sick at 7am and I volunteered I could stay late; maybe even just cover her whole shift until 3:30pm. Since I hadn’t planned on being work so long I did not put my sun shade up in my car and just before the store opened at 8am I asked my manager to let me out of the store to go put it up. When I went out I noticed one of my regular’s car (the man is in his 70s possibly 80s) at the Subway he often frequents daily in the same mall complex. I always got a creepy vibe from him so I avoid him at all costs and know his car by site so I can avoid him.

Well, I worked until 3:30 and I was on my way out of the store to go home and as I walked up to the register to clock out and leave I saw his car parked in the front handicap spot and him getting out. I proceeded to quickly exit the building using the far door away from him to get past him and to my car before he could engage me. He yelled my name out towards me as I was walking past the far spot from his car. I waved in an obligatory manner and proceeded to cross the street to get to my car in the parking lot. I even had a truck stop for me to let me cross and I took advantage of that.

I sped walked to my car and fought with my sun visor so I could get away. I threw my car in reverse because I couldn’t pull forward through the spot because another vehicle was parked there. I looked in my mirror and he was standing directly behind my car. I got out with the thought I could take him on better if I was standing than if I was sitting in the car trapped. I ended up trapping myself with that move, the car door was open behind me, my car was to the left of me, my coworker’s car was to the right of me and the man was in front of me blocking my only exit to run.

Read More

(Source: reddit.com)